Posts Tagged ‘Funny’

Australian Cricket

11 January 2011

Q. What is the height of optimism?
A. An Australian batsman putting on sunscreen.

Q. What is the main function of the Australian Coach?
A. To transport the Team from the hotel to the ground.

Q. Why don’t Australian fielders need pre-tour travel injections?
A. Because they never catch anything.

Q. What’s the Australian version of LBW?
A. Lost, Beaten and Walloped.

Q. What do you call an Australian with 100 runs against his name?
A. A bowler.

Q. What’s the most proficient form of footwork displayed by Ponting?
A. The walk back to the pavilion.

Q. Who has the easiest job in the Australian squad?
A. The guy who removes the red ball marks from the bats.

Q. What do Australian batsmen and drug addicts have in common?
A. Both spend most of their time wondering where their next score will come from.

Q. Why are Australian cricketers cleverer than Houdini?
A. Because they can get out without even trying.

Q. What does Ryan Harris put in his hands to make sure the next ball almost always takes a wicket?
A. A bat

Twas the night before Christmas

24 December 2010

Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the office
Not a creature was stirring, not even a Tester.
The archietcture was drawn on the whiteboard with care,
In hopes that a Shaping Arhcitect soon would be there.

The Business Anlaysts were nestled all snug in workshops,
While visions of requirements danced in their heads.
And the PM in MS Project, and I in Visio,
Had just settled our brains for a replanning session.

When out of the lift there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the meeting room to see what was the matter.
Away to the whiteboard I flew like a flash,
Tore open a Marker and threw up the flipchart.

The flouresent light on the new-drawn design
Gave the lustre of decoupling to objects below.
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a Business Sponsor, and eight tinny SMEs.

With a little old driver, so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it must be the General Manager.
More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name!

(……..)

He sprang to the lift, and to his team gave a whistle,
And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.
But I heard him exclaim, ‘ere the lift door closed,
“Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!”